Thursday, April 20, 2006

Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers!

I wrote this entry yesterday, but Kate called and kept me on the phone for two and a half hours. So it's a day late (and clearly a dollar short).

I am not a regular lottery player. But every now and again, when the jackpot gets big enough, I like to buy a ticket, as much for the imagination as anything else. Years ago when I waitressed at a country club, I bought a Mega Millions ticket. Mega Millions, fyi, is the multi-state lottery system between New York, New Jersey, Minnesota, Maryland and some other states I don't recall. It has currently "rolled" 12 times without a winner, thus tonight's jackpot is for $265 million.

Anyway, I digress. I bought a ticket back when I was a waitress and when I would feel particularly annoyed with the haughty clientele, the manager who was incompetent, but sleeping with the boss, or the 95 degree temperatures in the kitchen, I would imagine quitting my job after winning the lottery. Sweet, so very sweet.

I obviously did not win.

At the time, I would imagine quitting much like Dave Chappelle in the Oprah sketch. "Ding ding ding ding ding! Attention everyone! I quit!" as I kick over a garbage can. Or perhaps more along the lines of Half Baked: "Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, and fuck you. I'm out."

A part of me still imagines quitting in that way. But what I really enjoy is thinking about how I would spend allll that money. Kate and I used to have an agreement whereby we would buy the non-winner a car and send our ex-boyfriends t-shirts that read: "My ex-girlfriend won the lottery and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

So, what would you do? I would definitely take some serious time off from working, though I think I would always wants to have at least a part-time job. I would go on my world tour, but I think I'd extend it to six months - Japan, Thailand, India, Australia, Botswana, South Africa, and I'd toss in a large chunk of Europe.

Also, I promised Phil over IM today that I would send him and Emily on a really cool vacation. And I'm pretty sure there would have to be a big trip to Las Vegas for some poker and black jack.

Alas, no win, so to work with me.

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